Ephesians obedience

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Jim,
It sounds like you were hurting when you posted this note.  I don't =
believe anyone had any intention of hurting you or ignoring your post.=20

I think in order to follow the scripture "husbands' love your wives as =
Christ loved the church" we need to know more about Christ.  Speaking as =
a wife, I used (past tense - please notice - I have learned better!!)  =
to read into that scripture my husband is at my beck and call....that he =
should fullfil all my needs and wants.  That is impossible for any one =
person to do.  Jesus was also a separate person, with needs of his own =
to be met.  As I have a very unselfish, easily loving husband it is easy =
for me to become selfish and I have to watch myself on that issue.  Yes, =
I know most wives don't have that problem or would not see it as a =
problem, but every couple is individual.  Love isn't always saying Yes =
or Giving.

I guess the best way to answer is to say, learn all you can about =
exactly what healthy love is.  Our idea of love has been warped to the =
point we have a distorted view of what real love is.  Read books like =
"Boundaries - When to Say Yes, and When to Say No to take Control of =
Your Own Life"  by John Townsend and Henry Cloud.  Another author is =
Gary Smalley.  His video series, Hidden Keys to a Loving Relationship, =
is fantastic.  Just keep reading and learning!  Also the book, Love is a =
Choice - not sure of the author.

Hang in there,
Debbie

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