Questions Lawyers Asked ... nyuk, nyuks

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Greetings Saints in Jesus name!

Here's some really good (and stupid) lawyer questions as taken
from official court records.... enjoy!

Bro. Tyler

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     From the Salt Lake Tribune:

      "Lawyers typically aren't funny -- unless by accident.
      Case in point: The following questions from lawyers were
      taken from official court records nationwide...

      1)  Was that the same nose you broke as a child?

      2)  Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person
          dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes
          quietly away and doesn't know anything about it
          until the next morning?

      3)  Q: What heppened then?
          A: He told me, he says, 'I have to kill you because
             you can identify me.'
          Q: Did he kill you?

      4)  Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?

      5)  The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?

      6)  Were you alone or by yourself?

      7)  How long have you been a French Canadian?

      8)  Do you have any children or anything of that kind?

      9)  Q: I show you exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize
             that picture.
          A: That's me.
          Q: Were you present when that picture was taken?

      10) Were you present in court this morning when you were
          sworn in?

      11) Q: Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage
             terminated?
          A: By death.
          Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

      12) Q: Do you know how far pregnant you are now?
          A: I'll be three months on November 8.
          Q: Apparently, then, the date of conception was
             August 8?
          A: Yes.
          Q: What were you doing at that time?

      13) Q: Mrs. Jones, do you believe you are emotionally
             stable?
          A: I used to be.
          Q: How many times have you committed suicide?

      14) So you were gone until you returned?

      15) Q: She had three children, right?
          A: Yes.
          Q: How many were boys?
          A: None.
          Q: Were there girls?

      16) You don't know what it was, and you didn't know what
          it looked like, but can you describe it?

      17) Q: You say that the stairs went down to the basement?
          A: Yes.
          Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?

      18) Q: Have you lived in this town all your life?
          A: Not yet.

      19) A Texas attorney, realizing he was on the verge of
          unleashing a stupid question, interrupted himself
          and said, "Your Honor, I'd like to strike the next
          question."

      20) Q: Do you recall approximately the time that you
             examined the body of Mr. Edington at the rose
             Chapel?
          A: It was in the evening. The autopsy started about
             8:30 p.m.
          Q: And Mr. Edington was dead at the time, is that
             correct?
          A: No, you stupid, he was sitting on the
             table wondering why I was doing an autopsy!