Enough Already!

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I write this post in sincerity and am in no way trying to make anyone 
look bad.  I write this out of curiosity and because I truly would like 
to see what others think.  I also write this with a heavy burdened heart.
 
Be warned, it is a little long and I apologize for its length right here.
 
I am hoping someone understands the situation and I hope I can get some 
response.

The church I attend and another church nearby, do not fellowship together

in any way.  I grew up not understanding why.  This past year, I have 
become so curious to find out why.  I began asking around my church to 
start.  I had already heard the rumors about this other church and I
wanted 
to know the truth of the matter.  I went straight to my pastor and his
wife.  
The answer I got was that they really didn't understand why but it had 
something to do with the other church thinking we didn't have high enough

standards.  That was that.  I was still left clueless.  The rumors...The 
church I attend was preached about from the pulpit as one that was going 
to Hell in a hand basket because our standards were low.  Rumor, We
preached 
that it was ok to watch TV and that my own pastor watches it all the
time.  
Rumor, The other church was very strange in their ways.  Over strict.  

As I put the thoughts on the back burner, time went by.  My sister was a 
counseler at the campgrounds this year and the other counseler in the
dorm 
was from the other church.  In fact the majority of the campers in that 
dorm were from the other church.  I began talking to one of the girls and

started seeing her.  The comments I heard from this other counseler were 
all of praise on how my sister was a very nice person and one of high 
standards.  Some rumors about my church were put to rest during that
week.  
As I dated this girl, I talked to many people from her church and got the

other side of the story.  The going to Hell in a hand basket thing, well,

long story but used as example and not that we were seriously like that
at 
all.  What they did say was my church did indeed slack on standards but
they 
had nothing against us.  

That picture quickly grew to be untrue.  As I seen this girl more, I
visited 
after service to take her out to eat. ( they started later than my church
so 
I was able to get there as it ended)  One question I was asked..."what
church 
you go to?"  "Brownsburg", I replied.  "oh." they stated as they looked
as 
if someone just died.  As I recieved a VERY ugly look from one person
from 
there, I asked the girl I was seeing why she gave me that look for.  She 
said because she found out I was from Brownsburg.  If they had nothing
against 
us, why was that a big deal?  A few days later, I found another reason
the 
churches were against each other.  A close person to the pastor of this
other 
church was suppose to of been the pastor of the Brownsburg church but
instead 
my present pastor was chosen.  The daughter of this particular man, (whom
is 
married and quite aged) said that started things.  As the original pastor
of 
this other church became ill, the present pastor of it today took control

and never relinquished rein.  

As I got out of service ealry one night, I decided to visit this girl.  I

got there and the pastor was just beginning to preach.  My friend and I
sat 
down to observe what made the saints there talk so greatly about their
pastor.
I admit, he had a good message.  Some of the things I viewed and learned
in 
that service were questionable though.  LIke for example, men and woman
cannot 
run laps at the same time around the church.  He really likes to push 
standards.  And what really got me was this, as he was preaching and
getting 
into it, he made a statement that went like this, "Listen up females,
some 
of you need to quit calling your "honeys" while your husbands are away!" 

No prob.  Until he pointed right at one of the sisters!  I found out
later 
this is not the first time he has done this.  

One time, a family came forward during a service and asked the 
congregation for forgiveness.  The wife was in tears.  What were they 
asking forgiveness for?  They missed a Wednesday night service.  The 
sermon he preached that nigth was about them and how if you miss church 
services you were going to Hell.  They missed because they were visiting 
a family member in the hospital.  Two Sundays later I got a phone call
from 
the girl I was seeing and I went over to see her.  She was visibally
upset 
over something.  She simply told me I had to go and talk to her pastor
and 
show him I had standards.  I asked why but she refused to talk.  I asked 
her friend and found out the story.  That night their pastor preached
about 
my friend and I.  He pointed the girl and her friend out and said, they
were 
seeing 2 guys from a church close by and that church had no standards. 
They 
needed to dump the sinners or check them out closely or they were going
to 
sin too!.  I became upset over this!  He had never even talked to me! 
Why 
did he think I was a sinner?  Now, he has the right to keep his flock
safe, 
but to judge me when he didn't know me?  

Lets look at a few of the *confirmed* standards in this particular
church:

  Woman have to wear sleaves past their elbows.
  Men must wear long sleaves.
  Ordelry fashioned running the aisles.  Men and woman run seperate.
  Woman must wear hair up during church, any other time, if worn
  down, must be curled and not straight.
  No fellowship with churches who did not follow these standards.
  Must have permission from pastor to buy car, house, etc.
  No excuses for missing church.
  Cannot wear a expensive watch.( the pastor, I am told by one of his
  saints, buys a new cadillac every year and trades the old one in.  Has
  a brand new 96 fullszed chevy truck.  State of the art exercise
  equipment.  3 or 4 horses. )
  Sundays, you have to wear your best outfit! Any other night you can
  wear your other suit coats, dresses, etc.  
  No kisses allowed in the church parking lot, it is
  God's property.

Not all churches within the UPC has these extra standards.  Many I am 
told are the pastors own convictions which he chooses to impose on his 
saints.  Why is my church bad because we don't follow "his convictions"? 

My church follows the UPC standards.  we even have a few extra of our 
own.  My pastor doesn't preach it is ok to watch tv like rumored.  The 
problem I see in my church is that there are a few stubborn saints which 
choose not to listen to the pastor.  Maybe the other church sees this, I 
don't know.

I have found some things as to why the churches don't agree with each
other 
and I personally think it is childish.  I quit seeing the girl from this 
other church because of the pressure put on her.  I was from Brownsburg
so 
I was a sinner.  

I recently re-asked the question about the problem to my pastor again. 
With 
the new found information, I was hoping if he was hiding anything he
would 
tell me.  My pastor said he had nothing against the other church and I
should 
not either.  They for some reason do not like us and he cannot convinces
them 
otherwise.  He also told me that a few weeks before this discussion with 
him, he ate lunch with the other pastor after a convention.  They talked
like 
best friends and nothing ever was brought up about the situation.

The burden I have and I took upon myself is to find away to unite these 
churches together in unity and fellowship.  The Brownsburg church is
actually 
the "mother" church of the other church.  My pastor started it!  He was 
very close friends with the first pastor of it until that pastor became
ill 
and past away many years later.  The present pastor, well...

I know this posting is long and I hope those who have read it this far
will 
forgive me.  It is a burden of mine.  I really do not see why the two 
UPC-Acts 2:38 churches do not fellowship.  I don't see why the two
pastors 
do not talk things out.  I don't see why it is ok for the other pastor to

rip my church so badly.  I want it to end.  If it means getting my nose
into 
where it don't belong and doing a Bill Clinton Peace treaty deal, I am
going 
to do it.  What is everyones thoughts on this?

God Bless,

Chris Sterrett
sterrett@juno.com
-------------------------------
Apostolic Bible Church
Acts2.38@juno.com
:-)