"PRAYING for a husband"

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Sis. Erin wrote:
| SOAP BOX TIME!!!!!!!

| I am single and always have been (never married - even B.C.).  It is
| unbelievable
| the **pressure** that you get ***from church people*** to get married! 
| Constant
| questions, people telling you how to change "so you can catch someone",
| telling you, "you're too picky", stating "they can't see anything wrong
| with you - why aren't you married?", the put-downs because you haven't
| married - something *must* be wrong with you!!! (Believe me - I could go
| on and on with example after example - not only
| from church members, but also from the ministry!)

Personally, I've never felt that at my church.  There are a couple of 20-30
something single men and women in my church and as far as I can see, no one
is pressuring them to marry!

| If young girls are "praying for husbands", it's because somehow they have
| been taught to!  No one has really spent any time teaching on - Marrying
| wrong - Too young - Waiting until you are financially stable - Serving
| God in singleness - etc, etc.

Not necessarily...I met the man I would eventually marry at age 11.  We
weren't dating then of course :)!  In fact, we didn't even like each other!
 At the time, neither of us was currently in church (me: backslide, him:
never been).  At age 15-16, I started to "notice" him and through the "big
mouth" of a mutual friend, we started dating.  I had made big mistakes in
the past about the guys I dated (no surprise, I wasn't leaning on God), so
this time, I prayed and asked God if this was the right guy for me to be
dating (no mention of marriage).  I knew he was the right one when he was
willing to risk rejection from his closest family members to continue
dating me (I am part "black"...that was a problem, still is for some of his
family).  No one had ever done anything like that for me before.  To make a
long story short...when we went to college (we're only 8 mos. apart) I
wanted to go to church.  Carl had no problem with this so he went with me. 
Turns out the church we chose was in revival at that time.  Carl got saved,
I renewed my relationship with God and now, three years later, we
celebrated our 1st wedding anniversary.  

| 
| **But** - the pressure is there - in the church - from a very young age -
| *****to marry and as soon as possible*****!!  I received the Holy Ghost
| when I was 19 years old and did not feel that pressure until *after* I
| came into the church - but I have felt it plenty since!

If I felt anything it was that Carl and I had dated WAAY too long for
comfort and we needed to get married as soon as financially possible!!! 
(Hey, God created *that* too.)

| BTW - it isn't that I am against marriage - it's just that I want it
| **right** and **in the Lord's will**!!!
| 
I couldn't agree more.  There are a couple of "couples" at church I know of
where one or both was not in church at the time and because God led them
together, they both serve the Lord.  Prayer is powerful.

Anneliese