groaner and clever mergers

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  A Groaner
  
  A large green frog hops into a bank, jumps up on the counter and says
  to
  the teller, "I want a loan."
       
  The teller says, "You'll have to see the loan officer.  Her office is
  down
  the hall and the name on the door say "Patricia Wack."
       
  So the frog hops off the counter, down the hall and to Mrs. Wack's
  office.
       
  He jumps up on her desk and says, "I want a loan."  Mrs. Wack, quite 
  puzzled, gives the standard line, "We must have something to secure the
  
  Loan, some collateral."
       
  At that the frog pulls out a ceramic lion, places it on her desk and 
  repeats that he wants a loan.
       
  So Patricia picks up the ceramic lion, goes in to the bank president's 
  office, places the ceramic lion on his desk, and tells him, "I have
  this 
  frog in my office who says he wants a loan, and this is what he has to 
  secure it.  I don't even know what this thing is."
       
  The bank president looks at the ceramic lion, looks at Mrs. Wack, looks
  
  back at the ceramic lion and finally says, "It's a knick-knack, Patty
  Wack. Give the frog a loan."
  _______________________________________________________
  
  	Merger Mania
  
   A number of years ago there was a proposed merger between Fairchild
   Electronics and Honeywell Computers. Rumor had it that the new company
   would be called Fairwell Honeychild.
   
   There is a merger in the works involving Polygram Records, Warner
   Brothers, and Keebler. It will be called Poly-Warner-Cracker.
   
   There has long been a rumor that W. R. Grace Co. was going to buy
   the Fuller Brush Co. and Mary Kay Cosmetics and then merge with the
   Hale Business Systems. This would result in the newmega-corporation
   Hale Mary Fuller Grace.
   
   Don't forget the failed merger between Yahoo and Netscape:
   Net'n'Yahoo. It didn't work out because they were afraid they would
   have to relocate the headquarters to Tel Aviv.
   
   Others in the works:
   3M & Goodyear = mmmGood
   John Deere & Abitibi-Price = Deere Abi
   Honeywell & Imasco & Home Oil = Honey, I'm Home
   Denison Mines & Alliance & Metal Mining = Mine, All Mine
   3M & JC Penney & Canadian Opera Company = 3 Penney Opera
   Knott's Berry Farm + National Organization of Women = Knott NOW
   Crabtree & Evelyn and Apple Computer = Crab Apple
   Swissair & Cheseborough-Ponds = Swisscheese
   Zippo Manufacturing & Audi & Dofasco & Dakota Mining = Zip Audi Do Da